Ms. Wisdom: Deal or No Deal?
Another typical day in my life. I get a phone call from my young friend in LA. She says after she told her boss that she didn’t appreciate his touches and close proximity to her in her office, she was called into the office of bigwigs yesterday, and was summarily fired, escorted to the parking lot and all. Her friends are telling her to sue. I say to her to wallow and cry for another 48 hours and then get started on finding a new job. I say to her what might sound like a cliché: “The best revenge is living well.” I say: “Get a job, get a life, and live it well. That will show the bastards the stuff you are made of. Their loss. Stop thinking that your dignity has been compromised because you were fired. Your dignity would have been compromised if you had succumbed and slept with your boss to keep your job or to be promoted.” She cries. I sound brave and wise on the phone, but I swallow my tears for my brilliant UCLA MBA friend. I hang up. I am telling you, I think I don’t deserve all the respect I get from my women friends. I am in the business of survival and search for happiness, even if it takes me to another continent, another country, another job, and another life. I fight as best as I can, and when I have to choose between martyrdom and departure, I depart. I won’t stay and fight to the last drop of my blood. I need my blood and my life to live and to help those dependent on me. I think my young friend may be able to win a long and uphill battle, but she will lose so much time, energy, and life in the process. What for? To prove a point that keeps being proven and yet the offense continues? I don’t know. I am not that wise, really.