A House For Two
hand-made travelogue by this Iranian Assyrian guy who went to Iran and came back and gave his (limited edition!) book to Jahanshah to publish. (If you can access Iranian.com, you really MUST see this amazing book). We talked about it for a few minutes. I find that just over the past 48 hours, he goes away but comes back more intermittently to check things out and then goes out again. We'll figure it out, I'm sure. It is just strange. Meanwhile, and in case you are wondering, my older son has not called me and twice when I called him, he was really busy and really excited, going to beginning of the term orientations and parties! Good for him, that party animal! Do you want to know the truth about how I feel? I think what my older son is doing is the natural and right thing to do for somebody his age and in his situation. I don't want my kids to worry about me or feel obligated to look in on me. I have made choices in my life of which I am proud. One of them was, for whatever reason, to leave a man almost three years ago. I came to live with my children in the US. I made that decision. I have to stand by it by myself and bear the consequences of it. Young men have a natural tendency to be protective of their mothers. If I'm not careful, I can create feelings of guilt and obligation in my children for taking care of me and I don't want that. I have lived and continue to live my life with my choices and they should live theirs unencumbered by responsibilities which don't belong to them. It's good to be a family, it is important to be close, but it is equally important to feel free to pursue one's meaning and mission in life. I want that for my sons. Me and the Traveller will have to figure out a formula which works for both of us.