Hard Tuesday

Loris Tjeknavorian conducts The Armenian Philharmonic Orchestra and Shahram Nazeri, performing a Kurdish song in Tehran in 2006. Simply lovely!

Farshad says it's raining in Tehran. I remember the soft spring rains of Tehran so well. The rain that spreads the sweet smell of wet dirt in the air and washes the pollution, delivering a spotless, shiny city back to all those who keep forgetting what a breathtakingly beautiful city Tehran is, surrounded by all those gorgeous mountains to the north, the south, the east, and west. I miss Tehran so much today. Our weather was sunny today, but I'm so cold all the time these days. I swear if I could, I would take my blue blanket to work and wrap it around me and sit behind my desk, just as I'm doing all around the house these days!

Someone around me is suffering from a breakup. It's so hard to watch him suffer, unable to do much to help. 'Happened difficulties' are the order of the day! And it's painful even to watch the thin face, the pained eyes, and the requisite sad and quiet solitude of an ended relationship in which a person must wallow and think and heal and eventually recover. I have been there and I know better than to try. True, you can take the person out to dinner or a movie for a few hours or try and engage him in a discussion about politics or arts, but soon he will have to go back to the cocoon of sadness which is built almost overnight around a broken heart. Delam misoozeh barash. I'm useless, though.
And as though I don't have enough challenges facing my present these day, I have been visited by my past again this week. It's been an unwelcome surprise. Yes, I know what to do and what to say, but it's hard just the same. I wished the past would stay exactly where it belongs, in the past. If you are having a good week, please tell me about it. My kids are telling me good stories about their work and school, too, which is really a blessing. I think some days everyone can stand to be infused with the hope that only others can give.


bayramali said...

it is midnight , I read your post and listened to this beautiful music several times . now it has stocked in my head and I can't sleep . who is responsible Nazy jan? ;D

Anonymous said...

I'd like to share a video too, it has helped me through ups and downs. Its about your school actually. these guys are very talented all PhD students from Berkeley


And I'd like to quote the old saying "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger"

and this new one:
"if it was not good be grateful, it could have been ridiculous!!!"

Esfand` said...

It was a hard tuesday for me too, with no obvious reasons, but then I slept for most part of the day :D

n now I am panicking, as to there are so many things I yet have to do.... and 3am in the night I am as fresh as an owl :P

I so totally agree with you on that break up thing, for some people, its just too hard :(
some people just cannot be like those jerks who can be off some one in minutes, and I think its something so sweet.
Though it hurts, but I rather prefer it this way, then be a cold hearted jerk.

Dont worry and be strong!, at times our past does visit us, and so this reminds me of this thing I read some where; "all those in your past didnt make it to your present for some reason" :) ..same is true for anything from past, not just the people I guess! :)

مسعود said...

سلام نازی خانم
شعر زیبایی از خانم فریبا عرب نیا از بلاگ
Dear Teacher,Satan
را اینجا می نویسم
از کوچه های یک طرفه خاطره
به شاهراه واقعیت می رسد
و از خروجی رویا می پیچد به سمت فردا
دیگر نمی بیندش کلاغ

خیلی عمیق است
موفق باشی

Aida said...

Nazy jaan,Salaam Aziz,

Whenever I am trapped in the past and emotionally move less, my grandmother always tells me,"put the history in an amber ASAP"!
And she is right,I just start imagining that that specific memory located in an amber which I can still see it but it is harmless to me and even others and I can even laugh at it.It is very hard exercise but doable and worth to try.
Take good care of yourself

Daisy said...

Nazy jonam salam,

Too bad I didn't have a very exciting week to report except 3 projects which have to be done by next Wednesday and one tentative job offer.

I wish I could have been there to take you to one of those spa resorts for some relaxing time. It would have been fun.

I need to tell you that I look forward to reading the rest of your interview with Maestro Loris Tjeknavorian. The section that he was talking about love was really good for me to read. I've to make a confession; that post made me think of my own approach towards love. I hope it helps me to be bolder and not to be so afraid of love. Yep, I'm terrified of falling in love (very pathetic, I know) because you never know how it turns out. I guess I only have to risk it.
I'm thinking of you. take care

Hyacinth said...

Salam Nazy jan,

I was sitting here thinking of a happy story to share to try to bring a smile to your face, and I looked over and saw our beautiful little Persian cat napping in the afternoon sun by the window, paws stretched wide, so relaxed and peaceful and happy and I thought, that's the story I'll share with you...the story of a 3 year old Persian cat, either abandoned or lost, roaming the streets with her two kittens, all of them starved and ill with respiratory infections, taken to a shelter by some good samaritan, and from there to a local rescue group, who took her into their foster system, and nursed her back to health...and finally adopted by my husband and I, as our little Christmas angel.

When we first got her, she was still a bit sick, super skinny, very shy, terribly stressed, and had a lot of trust issues...but slowly over the last 3 months, with a lot of love and patience, she has blossomed into this beautiful creature which purrs like crazy when we look at her, follows us around like a little puppy, and has enough trust in us to sleep with her paws up in the air and all her vulnerable parts exposed to the whole world, knowing that she's safe and loved in her forever-home.

So here's my story for you, which didn't have a great beginning but it continues to have a very happy ending.

Hope the rest of your week is wonderful :)

Nazy said...

Salam Aghaye Bayramali:

Thanks so much for coming. I'm sorry my post kept you up! I am glad you enjoyed the music my friend. I hope you are having a good night's sleep as we speak! Be good dooste man.

Nazy said...

Anonymous Jan:

Thank you so much for that funny clip! I know that building on campus very well, and it was funny to watch it in a YouTube videoclip!

Thank you also for the quotes. They helped. Did you leave your name out intentionally? It's O.K. Anonymous works for me, too!

Please come back again.

Nazy said...

Dear Esfand:

How wise and kind you are! Your words mean a lot to me. Already what happened on that Tuesday is the past for me, to learn from and to forget the rest. Here and now is what it's all about, really.

Thank you for your compassion.

Nazy said...

Salam Masoud Jan:

Yes, that excerpt was deep and meaningful to me. Thank you for sharing it and for cheering me up. You're really kind.

Nazy said...

Aida Jan:

What a wise and kind grandmother you have! And what beautiful imagery your comment contained! Thank you very much for your advice. Really.

Nazy said...

Salam Daisy Jan:

Heeh, a spa treatment! That sounds really good. Well, in your mind and in mine, the deal is sealed and we have already gone to our spa treatment! I feel better knowing what kind and caring friends I have.

Don't be afraid of love, Daisy Jan. What is the worst thing that could happen? Your heart will break? That's O.K., too, my friend. A broken heart will help you grow and enjoy life's joys, aware of its pains. Give it a shot when the opportunity presents itself. You never know what is in store for you! I think love is God's gift to us. When offered, accept it. Be good azizam.

Nazy said...

Hyacinth Jan:

What a great story that was! It cheered me up to no end. Thank you for the loving way in which you told it, too. Very sweet. Your cat is very lucky to have a home in your family.

You are wonderful.