3/06/2008

Memories of Stores

Taleghan Dam, last Friday, February 29, 2008. Photo by Universal Farshad. Take a look at the breathtaking reflection of those mountains in the half-frozen water. Thank you, Uni-Far.
I ended an exhausting day at the office and rushed to have dinner with two of my sisters. It was a really wonderful time, spent chit chatting and catching up on each other's doings. My sister will leave again on Saturday, and this was my last chance to see her on this trip. The three of us walked into Macy's after dinner and I was reminded of all the years we were poor and broke as students, when our favorite pastime was walking around in shopping malls, never being able to afford buying anything! Perhaps now I can afford to buy things, but I find that I like shopping less and less, only succumbing to the activity when I absolutely need something. Just the same, it was sweet to walk down the empty giant store, talking and laughing. I said goodbye to my lovely sister who is getting ready to go hold the twins in Paris for Nowrooz.
I am going to SFSU Iranian Culture Club's Nowrooz party tomorrow night, organized and managed by His Majesty, Ala Hazrat Haj Agha, and then on to celebrate his birthday with our other friends. Something rare and fabulous is also happening tomorrow night: my kids and their friends are also going to the event with me! Well, they aren't really going with me, but they'll be at the same place as me! I gave up trying to go anywhere with them a long time ago, realizing that as they age, it is less acceptable for them to be hanging out with their mother in public! Hee Hee, I just remembered a memory!
When my older son was 15 or 16, one afternoon he and I went to Super Jordan to shop. I had a small cart which was filling up quickly with the things I was throwing in it, and my son was pushing the cart down the narrow isle. At one point I went to get some milk and when I came back, there was a bottle of Delester, the popular non-alcoholic Iranian beer, in my cart. I thought someone had put it in there by mistake. So, I picked it up and looked around to see who was shopping in my vicinity. At this time, my son said to me: "That's mine!" I looked at him with surprise and asked him: "Really? You like Delester? That's interesting! Why did you take just one? Get some more!" In the time it took me to say those words with joy, I noticed that my son had disappeared! I looked around and he was nowhere to be found. I paid and took the things to the car, scanning the street, but I couldn't see my son. What happened to him? When I got home he was there, but looking sullen and quiet. I asked him what had happened to him and he said that I had embarrassed him by getting so excited over the Delester business, and he had decided to leave! I guess I might have gotten a bit loud with the joy of discovering something about his changing taste, and this had embarrassed him! I decided then that whenever in public with my children, I will act "cool" and "detached," because it will be a number of years before hanging out with the older woman who loves them and oooh's and aaaah's over them becomes something welcome and acceptable. These are the years I must be keeping my public distance from them, and I do it willingly. They know and I know, that the unfazed demeanor and the quiet lips of their mother have left all the work of loving and expressing affection for them to her eyes which scan the room to see them and guide her heart to get filled with pride and love, while all the time looking oh-so-cool and indifferent.
Happy Friday everybody. I'll write my Friday post late tomorrow night and reply to your kind comments then. Be good y'all.

18 comments:

fari said...

sala nazy aziz
didane madari ke be in khoobi mitoone dak kone bbachehasho lezat bakhshe
chizi ke in rooza makhsosan inja kame va man ham khoshbakhtane az in nemat barkhodrdaram va behesh eftekhar mikonam fek mikonam pesaraye shoma ham behesh kheyli eftekhar mikonan

! said...

سلام نازی جونم
خوبی ؟؟
خواهش می کنم بابا این چه حرفیه !!!
نازی جونم نوروز پارتی خوش بگذره!!!1
من فکر می کنم این خیلی خوبه که شما اونجا به خودتون خوش می گذرونین
این فری عزیز هم نکته ی جالبی رو اشاره کرده ها !
من هم باهاش موافقم
خوش باشی

Mehran said...

Can't wait to see you Nazy jonam. Thanks for coming It means alot to me
Love

Farideh said...

Nazy dear, you succeeded at last!!! to make me to make a blog! I am at: "from tehraniwrite.blogger.com" have a look if you have time my dear.... "hamash taghsire to bood"... haha.... and thank you...

ghaslbe khoshbakht said...

nazy e golam ,
I am really enjoy about the nice picture, very useful memory and your iranian party, I hope every things be ok.
thaks azizam

Shobeir said...

I am zillions of miles away from having enough courage to be a decent parent....
Reading your blog helps me remember my very own life-line and memories and find out what my mother has done for me!
TNX Nazy!
WIsh you a joyful night...

Aida said...

Nazy jaan,
What a thoughtful and understanding mother you are.you sons should be proud of you.Sometimes we think to be close to someone just means to hang out with him/her,which does not work all the time.How nice you described it.
Have a wonderful weekend
Aida

Anonymous said...

سلام نازی جان
آره خیلی خوب می نویسی و زیباتر احساست رو بیان می کنی! آفرین.لذت بخش بود خوندنش .
خیلی خوب احساس پسرت رو درک کردی و بها دادی بهش . این سخته البته و از عهده همه بر نمیاد.
خوش بگذره نوروز و جشن های قشنگش به تو و همه

مرضیه

مسعود said...

سلام نازی خانم
اگر درست فهمیده باشم،بچه ها معمولا توی این سن و سال میل به استقلال و بخصوص نشون دادن این میل دارن.توجه معمول والدین رو به کوچک انگاشتن خودشون تعبیر می کنن. ما هم توی این سن اگر توجه پدر و مادر رو به کسی میدیدیم بهش می گفتیم :یاروبچه ننه س
.یادش بخیر
فردا شب هم مواظب باش

Nazy said...

Fari, Fari,

How are you? I don't know, you'd have to ask my kids to see how they feel about me and about our relationship! I'm glad you have a good one going with your mother. These are passing years which will never be repeated again. I try to enjoy my time with my kids for as long as they are living with me. Once they leave, I doubt they'll ever come back in the same way.

Be good Fari Jan.

Nazy said...

Farshad Jan:

Thanks so much for those photographs! I loved them all. I'll be posting more of them as soon as I get a chance. Boy Voyage Uni-Far Jan! Come back soon.

Nazy said...

Salam Bar Mehran-e-Azizm:

OH MY GOD! I can't believe it! Is it really you, Mehran?!

Just kidding! I had such a good time at your event. You guys were awesome and you did a very good presentation of those poems and messages of hope and peace. I should thank Alef Shin for his kind attention and help.

As far as I'm concerned, YOU RULE!

Nazy said...

Farideh-ye Azizam:

Blog-et mobarak! I have come and visited you several times! How very exciting! Your posts are so sweet to read. I am your Moshtari to be sure! I also added your link, and hopefully my friends will start visitng you and reading your very interesting posts.

This is absolutely fabulous! You will see how rewarding blogging can be. Have a good day in Tehran, my friend!

Nazy said...

Khanoomi Jan:

The party was great and we went out to celebrate afterwards. I was a bit distracted with some other things going on, but in all it was a very good time. Jatoon khali bood!

Do you have your haft-sin ready yet? Is your sabzeh growing? I hope anticipation for Nowrooz has filled your living space and is giving you and your husband hope and strength to spend your first Nowrooz away from your families and Iran.

Happy spring Lucky Heart Jan.

Nazy said...

Thank you so much Marzieh Jan.

When your way is lit up with the light of love from your heart, you will know what to do. That's what I think. I'm sure you're doing exactly the same thing and even better than me.

Have a good evening my friend!

Nazy said...

Thank you, Shobeir Jan! I'm sure in time you will figure out how to be a good parent. You must have an extraordinary mother to have turned out as you have my gifted friend. My best regards to her.

Nazy said...

Sweet Aida:

The jury is still out on what kind of a parent I have been. When my children are grown men with families of their own, treating the women in their lives respectfully and lovingly, and raising good children, I will know that I did it right.

Everybody needs his/her own space sometimes. We must always travel next to them with a respectable distance. It takes practice, but it's doable, I think.

Have a good week Aida Jan.

Nazy said...

Salam Masoud Jan:

Last May, I wrote a post about what you described. Since then, my younger son's title has become "the Traveler." Take a look:

http://nazykaviani.blogspot.com/2007_05_01_archive.html#972122754970678334

I was good at the party, Masoud Jan, rest assured! Jatoon kheili khali bood. Enjoy the Ahvaz spring my friend.