5/31/2007

Unknown Caller

My phone display says: Unknown Caller. Most definitely, it’s a call from Tehran. I’m paralyzed with the desire to pick up and talk to a loved one, and the anxiety of what I might hear. I wished I wouldn’t get some of those phone calls from Tehran. I wished I knew which one of those callers were going to tell me things I don’t need to know and I don’t want to hear, so I wouldn’t pick up their calls. I wished people would respect what it has taken to leave, and wouldn’t tamper with it.

10 comments:

Assal said...

I always get a chill when I get a ring from an unknown number.

خانم شین said...

نازی عزیزم

اینها را که می نویسی یاد مادرم می افتم. مادر من یک عمر است که از تلفن متنفر است. از بس از تلفن خبرهای ناجور شنیده است. تلفن که زنگ می زند و شماره ترکیه را که می بیند رنگش می پرد. البته الان کمتر. چون دیگر آنها که ترس از رفتنشان داشت همه کم کم رفته اند. مهاجرت سخت است و از آن سختتر دوری از آشنایان است

ساعت شنی said...

Dear Nazy,
I recently found about your blog and became a fan at my very first visit. Well, and I confess that I also envy your english!
Thnaks for adding my blog's link to your list. :)

Nazy said...

Assal Jan, It's not a creepy feeling. I share a past and memories with some of the people who call me, and I love them. I wished we would just talk about ourselves. Be good Assal Jan.

rahnavard said...

Salam nazy jan
Baraye telephone narahat konnandeyi ke dashtin motaasefam. gahi in harfhayi ke nakhaste mishnavim masmumemun mikonan. Kash mishod be rahati chizhayi ro ke khodemun nemikhastim bebinim ya beshnavim az khateremun delete konim.

Nazy said...

Shin Jan. Such is the life of a nation misplaced after the Revolution. Take care and thanks for coming back.

Nazy said...

Sheni Jan: Thanks for coming to visit and for leaving a comment. I have been coming to visit you, too, for a little while. I envy your Farsi, and your intelligence! Very refreshing. Come back soon.

Nazy said...

Rahnavard Jan. Thanks for coming and for leaving that kind and sensitive comment. Yes, if only we could pick and choose what we want to see and hear in this world! A hard piece of writing I have been working on recently has to do with how I inadvertantly (tasadofan) saw some pictures somewhere, and how by the time I realized what I was looking at had left such a painful mark on my psyche for the rest of my life. Be good Rahnavard. Keep on writing; you are good.

SERENDIP said...

Assal: I feel exactly the same way. I thought I was the only one. I'm glad I'm not alone.

Nazy jan: I know the feeling. Sometimes, you just have to put yourself first and protect your mental health especially when you're haveing a melt down of sort...LOL

Take good care of you and it's sometimes good to confront our subconcious and deal with the past trauma before they deal with us.

Nazy said...

Thanks for your comment, Serendip. I think it is a cultural thing, where people feel if they don't share the "information" they have found, they would be disloyal to their friendship. I want to tell them that the information they share with me, regardless of the content, is useless yet painful to me. I was hoping they would know, because I never ask any questions, nor do I ever react to the stories I hear. You are right, though, to save my sanity, I will have to be upfront about it. Yikes! Hate the "upfront" business, is my problem. Thanks for your thoughtful remark.