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I am a citizen of this planet, who believes there is a purpose and mission to our existence. I pursue that mission and try to enjoy every lesson, every day, and every last drop of the pain and joy we drink when we live. I live a mostly regret-free life, with each failure quickly becoming a valuable experience and something to laugh about, and every success something about which to be thankful and celebrative. I do all of this in and around my beloved Berkeley, California.
10 comments:
Guess we were not it's target, cuz I can't get what's the perpose behind it...!
May be there is not any...
Nazy jan: I have seen this before. The Islamic republic has to understand that you cannot force anyone to do what they don't want to do regardless of the behavior in question...
Check this out:
Could this be true?
http://jostojoo.blogsky.com/
Salam Bar Takhovski. I think the target are "roostaeeyane aziz!" I think the most amusing part is the "dozdgir" business! Thanks for coming and for leaving a comment. Come again.
Salam Bar Serendip: Actually, I believe this sign to be prepared more by a zealot than an official! I looked at the link you provided. I don't know what to say! I know temporary marriages are customary and in full practice for various reasons. But I had never seen it advertised like this. Be good Serendip.
Nazy jan: I had no idea temporary marriages were such a common place. I'm shocked. What are the justifications for this debauchery and degrading of women? Economics?
Salam Serendip:
In fact temporary marriages are a lot more complicated, yet a lot simpler than that. Without delving into the politics of it, and the roots of why it is even necessary to have Sigheh in Iran (each of which will require their own five pages), I will try to answer you as best as I understand it without too much fanfare.
Let's put the cases where it is only for a few hours and it is nothing but sanctioned prostitution, aside. That is what it is and does not need further explanation--World's oldest profession, only legitimized through religion.
There is another group of women who are uneducated, poor, and desparate, and they may become a man's second wife to gain his financial support, and this is done through temporary marriages. A sad situation, but given the alternatives (prostitution itself becoming one of the few options available to those women) this might actually work out for some. This, I believe, is the only really degrading application of Sigheh, because those women think they are "married" to somebody, without real rights, and without complete rights for their children from these "marriages."
Among the more educated and emancipated Iranians, however, temporary marriages are very prevelant these days. This is where couples want to co-habit unofficially (without a formal marriage, as is customary in the west). A temporary marriage license enables them to live together without the possbility of harrassment by the government who would interfer in such matters. Would you believe it if I told you that when some young couples fall in love these days, because of the high rate of divorce, their parents many times encourage their children to go live with each other before they decide to get married? Doing this is only possible if the couple obtains a temporary marriage license.
Even when they don't want to live together but want to have active sexual relationships and travel inside Iran together, dating Iranian couples receive a temporary marriage license which enables them to check into hotel rooms (hotels won't let an "unrelated" man and woman to check in together.) You will agree that this is not prostitution, but a practical solution to a problem.
The long and short of it, Serendip, is that in today's Iran Sigheh is not all about prostitution (receiving financial consideration in return for sex). It is, in many cases, all about sex, and not about marriage or money. And as I understand it, a lot more sex is going on there than is publicly acknowledged! Are you surprised? The world's youngest nation, remember that one.
Like you, I used to hate Sigheh with a passion. Under the circumstances in Iran, I have adjusted my thinking and think that it might actually be a blessing in disguise in some cases. I hope this is helpful.
wow, that was such an eye-opening revelation for me. It might be economically cost efficient for the society as a whole as a self-perservation mechanism but I doubt very much it enhances dignity, self-respect, self-control, or personal or spiritual growth of any kind.
I also should add that this practice will have devestating effect on the moral and collective concious and fabric of the society in the long run.
Salam Serendip!
Please don't get me wrong! In no way do I condone temporary marriage as an acceptable moral or social concept, given a choice. For one thing a "temporary marriage" is an oxymoron. How can you have a "temporary union" or a "temporary family?"
For another, having this fake "marriage" promotes duplicity in the society and mocks the importance of committed relationships and families.
And even when it is done for access to consentual sex, as I reported, it is done in reaction to the government's "carte blanche" for asking what you and another person are doing in the privacy of your bedroom--a violation of people's basic human rights. As Shamloo said:
...
dahanat ra mibooyand
keh mabada gofteh bashi
doostat daram....
(sorry if the poem is not quoted correctly here, I don't have access to my book right now to fix it.)
Anyhow, yes, I do believe all of the above will continue to degrade people's values (ironically their religeous values) and to make a mockery of committed relationships. Any positive things I said about the routine is strictly from a "survival" point of view.
Take care my friend.
Thank you Nazy jan. Eloquently put. I can't believe this is happening to Iran...
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